Moving on from a relationship that has ended is one of the most difficult things to accomplish in anybody’s life. It can sometimes be worse than mourning over someone who has died, because you fought for this relationship with your whole heart and soul.
If there’s anything you have to learn about enduring a heartbreak, it’s that the process of moving on and getting over it doesn’t happen overnight. So yes, you have no choice to give time, patience, and effort for the wounds to heal and the pain to go away.
There are actually a lot of ways in which you can get over a relationship and move forward to brighter beginnings. If you feel that you’re currently stuck in a limbo because of the heartbreak, then these tips might just come in handy:
1. Tell yourself that it’s over.
One of the first things that you feel after experiencing a breakup is denial. This is of course normal, as who wants to face the end of a relationship they’ve thought and worked hard to be for keeps, right? But if you are eager to move forward from the heartbreak, then it’s a must that you take the stand and tell yourself that it’s all over now.
Yes, you owe it to yourself to tell the truth, and you need to hold on to it no matter how painful it is. Once you’ve done so, the succeeding steps towards becoming free from the pain brought by the breakup would be easier to endure.
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2. Give yourself the time and space to grieve.
A lot of people try to move on by entertaining new relationship prospects, even if they are not yet emotionally ready. While this works for some, it is not advised that you go for a rebound just to mend your broken heart.
Rather, give your heart the time and space to grieve. You need to mourn over the death of something you held on to dearly, and your relationship was something you fought hard for in order to stay alive. So yes, cry if you feel like doing so. Scream whatever you feel inside, just to let all emotions out. Allowing yourself to grieve helps a lot in managing your emotions, because it flushes out those that only make you feel worse, and makes room for clearer and fresher thoughts.
3. Do some spring cleaning.
Moving forward means starting a new slate. Maybe one of the reasons you find it hard to move one is because you are still clinging to the memories of the past. It is then recommended that you do some spring cleaning, so that you can finally get rid of the things that remind you of your relationship that went kaput.
You can start by cleaning your room and putting your memories in boxes. These include presents, photographs, letters, and all other items that remind you of your heartbreak. You need not throw them right away, but better store them in some place that you do not easily reach. This way you cannot just get back to them whenever you feel nostalgic.
Afterwards, you may want to clean the rest of the house, replace the sheets and curtains, and make it smell brand new. Spring cleaning helps because it gives you a much fresher perspective of the present, and maybe it’s just what you need to realize that you’re off to a new lease on life.
4. Make friends.
One perk of having gone through a breakup is that you are once again free to do whatever you want in the area of socializing. So yes, it’s time to make friends!
You may want to hang out with your current pals and go to bars and clubs, or whichever event wherein you can meet new people. You may also want to join online groups through chat and online dating apps just to make friends. Who knows, you may meet your true love in one of these places!
5. Get hold of your other priorities.
Whenever we go through a breakup, we think our life is literally over. But no, it isn’t. And you have to keep that in mind. It isn’t because despite the breakup, you still have other priorities in life that need to be accomplished. These include career goals, travel bucket lists, learning new skills, etc.
Focusing on these things keeps your mind preoccupied and your heart’s attention diverted to things more meaningful. You need to work on these priorities because once accomplished, they become tangible outputs of your hard work and determination to stay alive. Besides, who doesn’t want to bounce back stronger?
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6. Start dating… yourself.
When fresh from a breakup, you may not realize it right away but you have, in essence, earned your freedom back. You now have the time to spend for yourself, with yourself. So yes, enjoy this break by going out with yourself, no less.
Watch the movies you like. Eat in diners you’ve been longing to try. Jog during afternoons. Go to a museum or an art gallery. And yes, travel! Find your connection towards your inner being, and from there it would be easier to accept some harsh facts, including that your relationship is already over.
7. Don’t keep the pain to yourself.
When in the process of moving on, it’s not advised that you keep all your feelings to yourself. This is because you have family friends who love you and want the best for you, and they are there to listen. Tell them your pain, your anger, your frustrations, everything you’ve got. By doing this, your immediate support group would know how not just to help you, but also manage your situation in such a way that you can speed up the process of healing and finally let go of the heartbreak.
In a nutshell
Not all relationships are meant to last, but it doesn’t mean that life is over once you face a breakup. It is best to treat it as a new lease on life, like another chance to make things right the next time. So yes, when moving on from an unsuccessful relationship, smile and keep your head up high.
