Love/Dating

This Is How You Lose A Woman Who Saw Your Worst And Stayed

 

One thing that has always made me feel proud of myself is that I’m a ride or die woman. When I love, I love to the bone.

I’m there for you through the good times and the bad times.

I don’t count mistakes and I always find a way to make things better. My mind is open and my heart is big.

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I know how to forgive and I know how to see through your pain. I’m a one of a kind woman and all of that wasn’t enough to make you realize that you should have treated me better than you did.

I saw you at your worst. I saw you when you were at your lowest, acting like everything you were afraid of.

I saw you when you acted exactly like you said you would never act. Maybe that’s what you couldn’t stand.

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Maybe you were ashamed of yourself and you took it out on me.

Well, the saddest thing is that your problems aren’t mine but I would have gladly helped you with them if you hadn’t ruined it all.

You started to act so insecurely. I wasn’t allowed to do anything without you. You started acting selfishly.

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Everything you said became a manipulation tactic and you wouldn’t let me breathe.

On top of all that, you didn’t even care to make me feel loved or cared for. You were possessive yet cold.

I got tired of giving my best to a person who didn’t deserve me. I knew that life wasn’t about constantly meeting the needs of others but mutual understanding.

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I knew there was more to life than watching you make the same mistake again and again and never changing and always failing to notice what I was doing for you.

I always had a problem leaving people and this was the hardest thing I had to do but I did it.

You didn’t break my spirit so I still knew my worth. I knew that if I didn’t leave you, I would end up broken and lost. And I’m not that kind of woman.

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I’m not someone you can control, someone you can use as an emotional punching bag.

I’m very aware of myself and the things I can do and give. I’m aware that I’m rare. That’s exactly why I know you will regret losing me once you realize I’m gone forever.

It takes me so much time to leave someone but once I’m gone, I’m gone forever. You have lost me.

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My heart is broken but my spirit is whole. I’ll find a way to mend my heart but you will never find a way back to me.

You should have never thought that your weakness was in your pain but in the way you let it control you. You let your fear become your insecurity and then you let your insecurity kill our love.

Love isn’t fear or control or walking on eggshells to stop yourself from triggering someone.

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Love is about honesty, about the deepness of feeling and being vulnerable in front of the one you love.

Vulnerability takes courage and you didn’t have it. You let your bad side consume you and you sacrificed our love.

I know you enough to know you won’t change, so I needed to leave you. One day you will think of us and ask yourself how you failed to recognize the true love I was giving you.

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We could have healed together but you choose pain. I didn’t. That’s why I’m here, writing this as I contemplate what was once our love.

I hope you’re not doing the same thing to someone else. I hope my love has taught you to face your demons, rather than blame others.

Meanwhile, I acknowledge the strength of my soul. I have learned to have boundaries. I finally understand that not everyone is worthy of my time or love.

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I learned that for love to make sense, two people have to work together and exchange energy.

Love takes two and it’s about reciprocity. Once I became aware of that, my heart started to slowly heal.

Today I can proudly say that I’m moving on because now I know I didn’t lose you but you lost me.

 

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