3 Steps to Stop Attracting Losers and Meet a Real Man. You deserve more! Almost everyone can admit that they have a certain type of the opposite sex that they like the most. Men can admit that they like blondes or tomboys; women can admit that they like muscular, handsome, or ruthlessly ambitious men.
Although most people are great at showing what their preferences are when choosing a partner, such as, “I only date guys who make me laugh,” or “I like guys who show strength and leadership qualities.” However, not all of us can clearly understand the fact that we can attract negative people. Not every woman is ready to admit to herself that she most often chooses those guys who make her suffer.
Frustration pattern
You may have seen this in yourself or your friends. Your girlfriend always picks emotionally unavailable guys, and your friend only dates girls who want his money. This tendency, as you might guess, is not a good thing—it leads to a pattern of disappointment, heartbreak, and ultimately cynicism about love.
When this starts to reach the point of absurdity, people go one of two ways: they either settle for someone who doesn’t make them that happy, or they give up on love entirely, concluding that all romantic comedies and Shakespearean plays are, in fact, full of lies. But we must keep in mind that the patterns are not final; their vicious circle can be broken. But how do you stop choosing the wrong people? It’s not that easy!
There are three steps you will need to take to stop this cycle of bad dating and relationships. These steps will help you break free from bad dating behavior.
It all starts with understanding why you date the wrong men, right? Only by understanding the real reason can you find a solution.
3 Steps to Stop Attracting Losers
1. Ask yourself why.
There is a reason why you choose certain types of people. Maybe you like drama; maybe you need a little fire in your life. You like a challenge, but most likely you are attracted to these types of people because they resonate with some deeper sense of yourself. People in all walks of life like things to be familiar and normal; it makes us feel safe. A lot of this has to do with childhood.
If you don’t like your parents, you can date people who are the complete opposite. If you like your parents, you can date people who are very similar to them. It’s not for nothing that they say that many girls choose guys who are similar to their fathers if the relationship between the daughter and father is close.
In either case, you are allowing habits to dictate your choices. If, on the other hand, you can recognize why you fall in love with a particular person, you will be better able to break the cycle of similar toxic relationships. Then you can go in search of something new.
2. Pay attention to how you talk to yourself.
Whether you talk to yourself out loud or just think, you are constantly talking to yourself in some way or another.
The people who often seem most familiar to us are the ones who echo the internal dialogue that goes on in our minds. They speak to us in ways that we secretly speak to ourselves, and sometimes this dialogue occurs in our heads without us realizing it.
So, what do you talk about with yourself? What do you think you deserve? How do you respond to failure or rejection? Do you find that the people you date reinforce this internal dialogue?
Something is stopping you from changing the type of people you date. Once you figure out what it is, you can choose people differently.
Psychologists claim that all our meetings in life are not accidental. Each partner is given to us by the universe so that we learn our lesson and change our attitude toward ourselves. Let’s change!
3. Consciously practice self-love.
This type of self-love does not imply anything that many might think. It is about spiritual love; you need to be able to value yourself.
Many people tend to be afraid of ending a relationship because of the fear of being alone. Overcoming this fear is the key to breaking the bad dating stereotype. So, take the time to get to know yourself and conquer your fear of being alone. When you are comfortable being alone, you will no longer seek out any possible encounter with the opposite sex to fill your inner emptiness.
When you’re comfortable being single, you can change the dating dynamic by being smart about who you date. You’re no longer driven by fear of being alone but by curiosity and the desire to find someone worthy of you. Someone with whom you can reciprocate your love.
There should be no fear in a relationship; if you go into hysterics just from the thought of being alone, then you urgently need to start practicing self-love. Learn to understand your value, because there is no one else like you! You are special and deserve love.
Remember that the most important relationship we have is our relationship with ourselves. When we are able to develop this, we can improve our relationships with other people.
