How to Subtly Flirt with a Girl – The Art of Subtle Temptation

Why should you know how to subtly flirt with a girl?

There’s a reason 50 Shades of Grey was the fastest selling book of all time. Reading allows for much more personal interpretation than say a movie or image. Ladies like to imagine and build up an emotional feeling long before they’re ready to become intimate – so you want to flirt with her underneath the surface. Tease her by making her figure things out and making her work a little.

First, get your game on if you want to  know how to subtly flirt with a girl!

Before we jump in any further, this is the key! Too many guys think of flirting as this passive, gentle stroking game. It can have those moments when it is indeed toned with softness, but overall, the girl’s looking to engage in verbal battle with you to test what you’re made of. For her, this is like mental masturbation.

Here’s how to subtly flirt with a girl

I’ve included a dynamite list here, so be prepared for some gold. Keep your eyes on these areas:

#1 It’s all in the eyes. Needless to say, if you want to know how to subtly flirt with a girl, you’ll have to have fun by doing this:

a. Have a smile in your eyes as you hit her back with cheeky one-two liners

b. Hold eye contact for longer than usual and see how she reacts

c. If her eyes are light enough, watch for dilated pupils – a sign that she’s responding well. If her pupils are small, ease off the flirting – as she’s probably not into it.

#2 It’s all in subtle bodily expressions. Sticking with the ‘having fun’ theme – play around with gentle facial expressions that you might think would be too subtle to be noticed:

a. Furrow your brow questioningly rather than asking, ‘are you serious?’

b. Wink knowingly after you’ve said something profound

c. Roll your eyes

#3 It’s all in the suggestiveness of it. Here’s a universal law you can trust: don’t talk about your past s*xual experiences, even when she asks. Generally, guys communicate in a more direct sort of way.

But for women, it’s all about inference and imagination. She wants to figure you out for herself, without you telling her – from your behaviors, things you talk about, how worldly you seem.

Be a bit mysterious – she doesn’t want you to tell her every little thing about you. Show her who you are subliminally. Become intriguing. Some tips:

a. Drop in things during conversation that reveal your knowledge of types of things girls like

b. Make statements about what kind of girl you think she is

c. If she asks how many girls you’ve slept with, say ‘I’m hoping you’ll be my first’ or something equally playful or ridiculous

#4 Compliment her. If you want to know how to flirt with a girl, you have to compliment her. For the longest time, I thought it was too predictable to tell a girl what I liked about her. But the easiest way to let her know she’s on your radar is to tell what you find lovely about her. Make this sincere and do it without planning ahead.

#5 It’s all in the intent. Have you ever found yourself talking to a girl, feeling as if you had to hold back the animal inside you desperately trying to come out? Why bother? No one needs to know what you’re thinking, but that storm inside you will help to communicate your desire subtly.

When you talk to her, this will make you register in her mind subconsciously as s*xually significant. Here are a few things you could do when making eye contact:

a. Let go to those primal thoughts you have for her

b. Imagine being intimate with her

c. Imagine kissing her

d. Imagine leading her across the threshold.

You don’t have to say what you’re thinking as it may be inappropriate depending on context, but being in the s*xual mindset carries electrical charge.

#6 Poke her. Some physical contact tips:

a. Playfully take her wrist, studying her bracelet as an excuse

b. Poke her briefly on both sides of her waist as you pass her *not hard, but enough that it might feel surprising*. If she reacts weirdly say, ‘oh sorry, thought you might be ticklish’

c. Place your arm on hers as you make a point *don’t look at her arm as you do it, that’s just awkward*

#7 Tease her. Teasing is a great tip for figuring out how to subtly flirt with a girl. As a teenager a girl had asked me, ‘do you fancy me or something?’ when I kept teasing her during lessons. I hadn’t even realized I was doing it at the time, but she’d been right. There are many sophisticated ways of going about teasing, however – be inventive. A few random ones:

a. Make an ambivalent statement about her that’s hard to interpret but which might be a half-compliment

b. Look away distractedly after saying something provocative

c. Playfully say one thing and do another

d. Pretend she’s goofy

e. Misinterpret what she says on purpose. A typical response to this type of teasing might be something like, ‘stop it, that’s not what I meant.’

#8 Be unpredictable. Long-term, you want to stay interesting. Flirting that is one-dimensional gets boring quickly – it’s too predictable and quickly seems childish. Let’s sophisticate your flirt game. Here are the dimensions:

a. Playful and positive

b. Playful and negative

c. Serious and positive

d. Serious and negative

e. One of the 4 above related to her

f. One of the 4 above related to you

Whenever you’re too much on one side of the spectrum, bring it to the opposite side. This is a way to never be predictable – even you won’t know what you’re going to say next, only the emotion behind it.

This way you can have an interaction that’s infinitely engaging and never gets boring. You’ll also never be too focused on either yourself or on her. She’ll want to see the conclusion and will even seduce you in order to find out how it ends. Don’t underestimate the power of this one.

#9 Use x in a text.

HER text: Hey what you up to? 🙂

YOUR text: Eating a bangin tuna sandwich x

The lowercase ‘x’… It’s another phenomenon that cannot and should not ever be underestimated. Think of an x as empathy. From her end, it says that there is something special about your communication with her. You don’t just send anyone an x, even your favorite bro.


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