If a girl isn’t some fairytale princess destined to meet her one true love, she’s likely going to have to deal with a bunch of frogs before she catches up to her Prince Charming.
Dating can easily become emotionally exhausting for even the strongest of women. We meet a guy, he seems really great, but then something starts to feel off and we realize it may have all been a façade. Over time, it can become really difficult trying to figure out if this one is Mr. Right or if he is more like Mr. Right … now.
There are several signs or characteristics that have been known to help tons of women determine if their guy is the real deal or if they are better off moving on to the next. And frankly, there is no shame in realizing the person we are with is not our endgame goal and doing something about it. We should never feel stuck in a relationship. Just take a page from Ariana Grande and say, “Thank you, next.”
With every new relationship, we grow and learn just a little more. We start to form our own ideas about what we want from our Prince Charming and what we cannot deal with. However, if soaking in the dating pool to figure this out isn’t an option, this list will definitely help in separating Mr. Right from Mr. Right Now.
20He’s Mr. Right If He Has The Friend Approval
Your best friends will always have your back, and they are probably going to see your relationship from a different point of view. When you enter a new relationship, everything is all glitter and magic. You are seeing everything through rose-colored glasses. This new guy has to be perfect; you just know it.
If your friends like him and think he is a good match for you, he is likely going to be Mr. Right. They want nothing but the best for you, and if this guy gets that coveted bestie approval he’s got to be doing something right.
19He’s Mr. Right NOW If He Doesn’t Have Trust
A relationship is nothing without trust. From trust comes great communication, and both are vital for a healthy relationship. If this guy you have been seeing doesn’t seem to have trust in you, he might not make it in the relationship on a long-term basis.
Trust is super important, but it is also necessary to note that many people do struggle with the concept of trusting another person. Trust is earned, but if your guy isn’t giving you any chances to earn his trust, he could be a bad match for you. This routine might be fun for now but being with someone who doesn’t trust you is going to get old.
18He’s Mr. Right If He Has A Great Sense Of Humor
Life is stressful and can be quite rough at times. A significant other with a great sense of humor who can make you laugh is so nice to have on those hard days.
The quickest way to the heart is through the funny bone, or something like that, right? Okay, that may not be entirely accurate but being with someone who can get those giggles out and bring fun into your life is a great thing.
You don’t want to lock yourself down with someone who doesn’t intrigue you or simply bores you. If this man has a way to make you laugh no matter what, he’s probably Mr. Right.
17He’s Mr. Right NOW If He Never Introduces Her To His Family
The family unit is often the most important part of a person’s life. In many cases, the immediate family is a group of people you trust the most and can count on for anything. We get nervous when it comes time to introduce our partner to the family, because we just want them to like him as much as we do.
Now, if your guy doesn’t have plans of introducing you to his family (and he doesn’t have any valid reason for it) he might not be taking this relationship seriously. He may be a fun guy to hang out with, but without connecting the family trees, that might be all he’ll ever be – the fun guy, right now.
16He’s Mr. Right If He Is Honest
There’s a reason people always say, “honesty is key.” That’s because it is. Finding someone you can share an open life with in full honesty is beautiful and rare.
A guy who isn’t afraid to share emotions or thoughts is someone worth keeping around. We’ve all probably been hurt at one point or another by a secret, a distorted truth or a lie. Dishonesty can seriously undermine a relationship and start breaking down the foundation of trust and communication. Being honest isn’t always easy, but it is always important. If you’ve found a guy who is completely honest with you, you may have found your Mr. Right.
15He’s Mr. Right NOW If He Doesn’t Listen
A guy who doesn’t listen to you isn’t present in the relationship. If he’s isn’t taking anything you say seriously, it’s probably time to seriously evaluate why you are in the relationship.
Communication is the strongest foundation for any relationship you want to work out, and communication involves both talking and listening. If he isn’t participating like he should, he is likely not endgame material. When he isn’t listening to you, he’s not taking in what you feel or what your needs are. A relationship cannot continue to grow if one person in the relationship isn’t doing their part to listen.
14He’s Mr. Right If He’s Passionate About His Independence
Relationships work best when both people involved have the ability to lead their own lives independently of the one they share together. A guy who isn’t afraid to let you do your own thing every now and then is a treasure worth keeping around. The reason he is likely open to this concept is because he is passionate about having his own independence.
“Without his own purpose, he can easily begin to smother you or fall into the trap of making you the source of his happiness instead of realizing he needs to find it within himself,” states Gulf Elite Magazine. “Always be weary of planning a future with someone who has no future plans for themselves.”
13He’s Mr. Right NOW If He Needs To Be Taken Care Of
No one needs to be taking care of a grown man who can survive on his own. You are not your boyfriend’s momma. Stop babying him. We understand there are times when a man does need to be taken care of, and that’s fine. What isn’t okay is doing everything for him all the time.
If he is forever needing you to take care of him, who is going to be taking care of you? Relationships are a delicate balance of push and pull. Two people who understand a healthy relationship are able to ask for help when needed and give support just as often. If he is doing anything less than what you need, think of him as Mr. Right Now.
12He’s Mr. Right If He Puts Effort Into The Relationship
When relationships are new, putting in effort is easy and even fun. When a relationship has some time behind it, the effort starts to fade. According to Gulf Elite Magazine, romance and effort are not something that should only happen in the honeymoon phase or as a ploy to get someone to commit to you.
“Real love for you will keep him trying for as long as you are together, whether that is five years or fifty,” expressed Gulf Elite Magazine. A man who keeps making effort long after he’s captured your heart is one to pay attention to and keep around.
11He’s Mr. Right NOW If He Doesn’t Bring Happiness
The great writer F. Scott Fitzgerald said it best with, “If you’re in love, it ought to make you happy. You ought to laugh.” A good relationship should bring you happiness and nothing else.
If this guy isn’t bringing you happiness, that kind of sums it all up. You don’t have to be with someone who doesn’t make you happy. Try not to fall into some pattern of comfort and get stuck with someone who isn’t making you happy to be with them. This is a guy who is definitely just a Mr. Right Now.
10He’s Mr. Right If He Has Similar Interests
They say opposites attract, right? While there may be something so intriguing about a person who is different from you, that can sometimes be a recipe for disaster. Two people who share similar interests are able to bond on several levels.
“We tend to be more comfortable with someone who shares our values and beliefs,” research psychologist Dr. Rob Pascale tells Cafe Mom. “When you and your partner share these characteristics, you eliminate them as sources of conflict. You also have an easier time communicating about many topics because you can relate to each other’s point of view.”
9He’s Mr. Right NOW If He Doesn’t Get Along With The Besties
We spoke earlier about how important it is for your guy to get your besties’ approval. But he should also make an effort to get along with them. It’s not always going to be an easy task – some people just don’t mesh well, and that’s okay – but he shouldn’t be rude to them or treat them badly. If he cares about you, he’ll care about them, even just purely because as your BF he should respect things and people you care about.
It can be said that your friends know you even better than you know yourself. If your friends aren’t feeling your guy and have valid reasons for why they don’t like him, you should probably listen to them. Your friends are there to help you. If they don’t get along with your significant other, it’s going to cause more rifts in your personal life than you want to deal with.
8He’s Mr. Right If He’s Attractive
Attraction is important in all romantic relationships. Of course, that doesn’t mean looks are the “end all” of a relationship, because we know connection in other areas can be equally as important. “However, finding him attractive can help to keep that spark alive even after those first few months of bliss,” states The Circle.
Over time, you might find your relationship will start to change, but attraction is always good in bringing back those initial butterflies you felt for your guy. That’s not to say you won’t be attracted to Mr. Right Now, because chances are, you are. It’s just that you definitely should be attracted to Mr. Right, too.
7He’s Mr. Right NOW If He Isn’t Thoughtful
Being thoughtful works both ways. Both people in a relationship need to make certain they are being thoughtful of the other person’s needs. If you find you are always the one doing the listening and the taking care of, he is likely not one to think about a future with.
If you find your guy always finds some way to turn what you say into something that has to do with him, he isn’t being thoughtful at all. This type of unthoughtful behavior is a learned personality trait and isn’t easily forgotten. You deserve a partner who is thoughtful, not a Mr. Right Now who’s not good enough to think about you.
6He’s Mr. Right If He Is Encouraging
A good man wants you to be your best self. He is going to encourage you to reach your dreams and be true to yourself. He will likely push you to find happiness and be there every step along the way.
“If you realize that being with your guy allows you to be who you really are, and live according to your core values – those attributes of life that you MUST have in order to feel right with the world – it’s a good sign you are with the right guy,” expresses self-improvement expert Dr. John McGrail to Cafe Mom.
5He’s Mr. Right NOW If He Doesn’t Go Out On Dates
If you’ve ever been stood up, lead on, or ghosted, you more than likely understand how important making time for your partner is to a relationship. Dating each other even after you’ve made things official is necessary to keep a relationship moving strong.
If your guy is never taking you out and never making plans with you, it can be hard to understand what he’s doing in the relationship. Planning date night shouldn’t always be on you. Mr. Right will go out of his way to show you off to his friends and family; Mr. Right Now doesn’t care about taking you out.
4He’s Mr. Right If He Is Emotionally Mature
Mr. Right will know how to handle all the ups and downs that come with any relationship. He can work through conflicts, show empathy and he is forgiving. He is emotionally mature.
A man who is argumentative or manipulative isn’t any man worth your time. This is a man-child and you will certainly be tasked with being his girlfriend-mommy. You want someone who can be your rock when you are crumbling – someone who can stand up and make the tough calls sometimes.
According to Cafe Mom’s relationship and marriage expert, Dr. Chantal Marie Gagnon, emotional maturity in a partner is key to creating a successful relationship.
3He’s Mr. Right NOW If He Isn’t Generous
Generosity can be a huge factor in determining if you are with Mr. Right or Mr. Right now. Keep in mind, though, that generosity doesn’t just involve money. A person can be selfish in tons of different areas of life.
We don’t want stingy guys and we don’t want guys who are selfish with their time or the love they give you. These are Mr. Right Now red flags. A guy worth your time will find happiness in being able to flaunt his generosity and spoil his girl. It’s probably best to ditch any relationship where you find yourself giving way more than the other person.
2He’s Mr. Right If He Is Respectful, Especially To His Momma
According to Cafe Mom, this one is a big deal. The relationship a man has with his mother can actually reveal a lot about who he is as a person. “If he treats his mom well, it’s likely he will do the same for you,” says author Dr. Karen Sherman.
In addition to lovin’ on his momma, you want to be with someone who is respectful to all types of people, even those he may see as “below him.” Likewise, you’ll want him to respect your own friends and family. If he doesn’t like them, that can be forgiven, but he should definitely respect them no matter what.
1He’s Mr. Right NOW If There Are Still Feelings For Someone Else
If you are with someone, but totally into someone else, the one you are with is likely just a Mr. Right Now. You can’t have genuine feelings for someone else and expect to be all in with the one you are dating.
There are many gray areas with feelings. Maybe you can’t be with the one your heart really wants, so to numb the pain you find another person to distract you. This is not enough, though, and you shouldn’t settle for that. You aren’t doing yourself any favors by dealing with Mr. Right Now when all you really want is Mr. Right.
