Relationship Advice: Women Who Do This Are Happier In Their Relationships
Too many women are afraid to argue in a relationship. “I shouldn’t even tell him my opinion because he won’t agree with me, and we’ll just end up fighting. And I hate fighting.” I hear this way too often.
And I understand that. I don’t like to argue either, and I like a warm and peaceful coexistence with my boyfriend. But I know that when I don’t express my strong opinion, it worsens our relationship.
If I refuse to argue, it’s like I’m losing my voice, and I feel hurt. Then my boyfriend senses my dissatisfaction and distances himself from me, and we end up in a sad, vicious circle.
Wouldn’t it be better to share with him what’s bothering me, what’s important to me, but not to quarrel, but just calmly talk about it and find out each other’s opinions? Then I feel more confident, and he knows my point of view, and then we can discuss the problem better.
When I hear that couples never argue, I immediately know there is a problem. The problem is that one of them is dishonest.
Disagreements in a relationship can strengthen it and make it better because everyone has a voice, you express yourself, and as a couple you come to some kind of solution or compromise. If you hold back and don’t speak up just to avoid an argument, it will build up, and you’ll start getting irritated over little things or behaving passive-aggressively.
This is bad for you and your relationship.
Why are we so afraid to argue? We are afraid that our other half will stop loving us. And sometimes this can happen. But what is the alternative? Pretending to be someone else? Living a lie, keeping your mouth shut, just so the other person will love you and be with you, even if they don’t respect your opinion?
A healthy relationship is when both people in a couple are honest with each other, disagree on some issues, and stay together despite the differences.
Some of us spend most of our lives being “good girls” and keeping our opinions to ourselves.
We think it’s rude, but it’s true. Speaking your mind tactfully and firmly is the path to self-confidence and happiness. Don’t you want to be with someone who will love you for your strong beliefs, even if he doesn’t agree with them?
So don’t be silent. Just do it calmly, be able to listen to the response, the arguments against, be open to discussion, and be sure that your opinion is important and worthy of being heard. Never stay with someone who does not value your opinion.
