Love Advice: The Most Honest Confession Of A Divorced Man!
This is the most honest confession of a divorced man! A memo from a recently divorced man, Gerald Rogers, appeared on the Internet, where he honestly told about 20 mistakes he made. Now he believes that no matter how difficult your family relationships are, they are worth fighting for.
I’m not a relationship expert. However, some of the experiences I had during my divorce made me wonder what I would do differently if I had a second chance. I lost the woman I was with for almost 16 years. And I don’t want you to make the same mistakes I did.
1. NEVER stop courting her. NEVER stop meeting her.
My biggest mistake was taking my woman for granted. When you asked her to marry you, you were probably sure that you would always fight for her heart and protect her. However, you likely forget these promises over time. Your wife is the most important and sacred treasure of your life. You chose her for yourself. Never forget it. And never be lazy in maintaining your love.
2. Protect your heart.
You must be the protector of not only her heart but your own. Guard it from other women with all due care. Love yourself and do not waste your time on trifles. No one should lay claim to your heart except your wife. And she, on the contrary, should penetrate it at the first request.
3. Fall in love. Continue to fall in love.
You are constantly changing. You have transformed since your marriage. In five years, you will not be the same person you are today. Living together daily requires conscious choice because change is constant. Fight and wand in her love just like you did in the first weeks of meeting her.
4. Always look for the best in her.
Focus on what you love about her, not what irritates you about her. Only then will your love for her continue to grow. Focus on those moments in your life when you felt loved and absolutely happy. You didn’t marry her for nothing.
5. Don’t try to change her. It’s not your job.
Your job is to simply love her. Don’t try to adjust her personality parameters to your own. Don’t break her. And then she will change herself in such a way that you will love her even more.
6. Take full responsibility.
Take full responsibility for your emotions. Your happiness is not your wife’s concern. She cannot make you pleased if you do not want her to be. You are responsible for making everyone in your family happy. If you can be happy, she and your whole family will be happy.
7. Avoid acting like your anger is her fault.
Frustrated with your wife is your choice and emotion. Your emotions are your responsibility.
Your woman doesn’t have to resolve your childhood traumas or chase you down with an emotional “bib.” If necessary, take a break, be alone, and sort yourself out. As soon as you stabilize your emotional background, you will immediately notice that the relationships in the family have begun to improve.
8. Let your woman just be.
When she’s in a negative mood or extremely upset, don’t try to fix everything right away. Her positive attitude is not your job. Just explain to her that it’s okay to be angry, frustrated, and frustrated from time to time.
Women are naturally inclined to view the world through an overly emotional lens. There is nothing you can do about it. But let her know that she can always rely on you. When she cools down, she will understand that you are a strong and strong-willed man. That she can trust you: you don’t leave the apartment when she’s upset. Give her confidence that you will be there for her, no matter how often she cries and what difficulties she has to face.
9. Be stupid.
Don’t judge yourself too seriously. Instead, laugh more often. And make her laugh. Laughter makes life easier.
10. Look into her soul every day.
Find out what makes her feel loved and protected. If necessary, make a list of 10 things that make her content with her life. Make it your priority. Try to make her feel like a queen every day.
11. Be present in her life.
Be attentive to her life. If she tells you something, listen. Do whatever it takes to communicate with her in the evening with an empty head. Treat her as if she is your most valuable client.
12. Accept her sexuality.
Don’t treat sex as just a way to relieve tension. It’s an opportunity for you to penetrate the deepest level of her soul. Allow yourself to dissolve in her tenderness. Let her know that she can trust you 100%—both in bed and in life.
13. Don’t be an idiot, but don’t be afraid to be one sometimes.
You will make mistakes. She will make mistakes. Have the courage to admit it so you don’t make a bigger mistake. You don’t have to be perfect. But you don’t have to seem stupid to her 24/7.
14. Give her personal space.
Give her free time. Let her meet her friends and have a hobby. Allow her to nourish her soul with energy. Stay with the children yourself from time to time. Allow her to relax and unwind. She needs rest as much as you do.
15. Be vulnerable.
Be willing to share your fears and feelings with her. Admit your mistakes. Apologize.
16. Be completely honest with her.
If you want to build trust between you, be willing to share everything with her—especially the secrets you’ve never shared with anyone else. This takes courage. But only after you’ve opened your heart completely will true love begin between you. Wear a mask wherever you go, but take it off whenever you return home.
17. NEVER stop growing together.
A stagnant pond breeds malaria, but a fast-flowing stream is always cool and refreshing. Unused muscles naturally undergo atrophy. The same thing happens to your relationship. If you stop working on your relationship, it will inevitably wither. Find common goals and dreams. Make common plans. And work on their implementation together.
18. Don’t worry about money.
Money is a resource that you must manage as a team. It never helps if you are afraid to use it. Learn to trust your partner. And remember: hiding a stash from your wife is a harmful form.
19. Learn to forgive and forget.
Forgive quickly and never bring up old grievances. Focus on the future and don’t let the past interfere with your plans. Avoid allowing your past to control you. Remember the mistakes you’ve made, but only for practical purposes.
Don’t reflect. Mistakes made in the past can become a heavy anchor for your marriage. They drag you down. On the other hand, forgiveness is liberating. Just cut the anchor chain and sail away without looking back.
20. Always choose LOVE.
In the end, this advice may be the only one. Using it as your life principle can change everything. If you choose love, then nothing will be able to threaten your happiness. Love will withstand everything. It will endure.
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