Living and surviving a long-distance relationship – 7 helpful tips

Long-distance relationships are the result of certain circumstances. You live and work in place A, while your lover has established his center of life in place B. The spatial distance is not always easy to cancel. Maybe your relationship is still very young and you do not want to make far-reaching decisions about a future together. But circumstances may just not allow them to contract right now.

Some couples live at a very short distance from each other, others become longer. There are also cases in which two people deliberately decide to leave a certain distance between them in love.

In any case, a relationship at a distance makes unique demands and rules for a life as a couple. That is not always easy. You can probably confirm that from your own experience. Here are some tips and pointers on how to get the most out of a shared life at a distance.

Especially how you can handle this bittersweet yearning.

The special challenges of a love at a distance

It happened quickly. In the last vacation you fell in love with a man who lives 800 km away from you. At the moment of being in love, you have not thought about this distance. That just turned out that way. At the beginning, the situation is very attractive.

It is just these intense hours as a couple that you really enjoy in your new love relationship. Since you come together for your meetings planned and always spends only short time intervals together, your encounters are special and exciting. Even the intermittent phone calls via smartphone and Skype let your heart beat faster and you feel completely as a woman.

Initially, the desire to endure one after another is good, it even makes a special appeal of your long-distance relationship.

After a while, the less pleasant aspects of life become more obvious at a distance. You still have to manage your everyday life on your own, even though in some situations you are very much looking for the shoulder of your loved one. Sometimes it’s just the opportunity to make a decision together.

But this yearning has to wait until the next scheduled meeting. It is also not always easy to create a familiar level of intimacy at the touch of a button when you come together, after you have been spatially separated for long periods of time. Then there is this yearning, which you may not always find romantic and stimulating, but increasingly simply torturous.

More and more often you ask yourself the question: Does this relationship even have a chance? Can you really trust your partner across this distance? Is there something about him if he does not make an effort to stay close to you? Doubts about doubts that can potentially put a strain on your relationship . Here, the idea of ​​separation can quickly ensue, if you do not become active now.

Do not always be together – where are the opportunities?

Many lovers at a distance do not want to believe it, but a long-distance relationship offers many opportunities for a couple in addition to the challenging aspects. Considered soberly, your love relationship becomes less quickly routine and tested by everyday life, if there are a few miles between you. So it can succeed in a distance relationship to maintain the so important tension relationship between proximity and distance.

Your partner will never be taken for granted . Even if you felt a little more about the beloved man.

It’s also much easier not to lose sight of one’s own life in a contact with distance, when you can not be together every day . In a distance relationship, you can more easily succeed in understanding your lover as an enrichment of your life, not as someone who simply has to be there and whom you do not need to pay much attention to.

The feelings for the partner are permanently in the center, and he does not become a person that you only need and for your own purposes. If you like, a relationship at a distance can be a particularly authentic couple relationship.

The distance also makes it easier to identify typical points of conflict in a love relationship that are often overlooked in close coexistence. Trust as a basis must prove more intense when you are physically separate.

How your consciousness strengthens your love

Also, typical day-to-day conflicts, which often become overly important in relationships in a confined space, are downgraded to a decent rank in a long-distance relationship and are less important. This can give a love relationship many positive impulses.

The prerequisite for a successful long-distance relationship , however, is that you are always aware of the special circumstances of being together and regularly check the situation to see if it is still right for you. Life, and above all, life together, is always about change.

The chances of a successful long distance relationship increase as you both actively shape your shared future. It should also be part of experiencing something like everyday life in certain periods of time, even if they are out of the circumstances.

Even a love relationship lived over distances profits from it, if it does not always consist only of moving climaxes and passionate encounters. You can do a great deal yourself to make it a success.

Accept and master the yearning – 7 tips

Above all, a successful long-distance relationship requires you to consciously adopt and shape the situation. Dealing with one’s own feelings is both a special challenge and an opportunity. Yes, there are times when you can hardly bear your own longing. And yes, even in this life at a distance, you do not always agree, and it can come to clashes.

Then it can be particularly difficult to deal with a long distance relationship. You can not just hug each other when the other one lives hundreds of miles away.

A successful communication is the alpha and omega in such a relationship . However, this also applies if you live together every day. Most people just do not realize that. If you are aware of this fact right from the beginning and your partner also assumes that, you have a great chance of staying in the long term despite the distance.

Here are some suggestions that can help you develop your ability to love at a distance.

1. Live trust!

   Trust plays a key role in every love relationship. This is especially true for a long-distance relationship. Of course, if the latter has simply emerged out of external circumstances and you can not change anything about it at the moment, then the subject of trust naturally takes on a special meaning. If you are always overcome by doubts that are not based on certain behaviors on your part or external circumstances, you should realize one thing: The very fact that your lover is taking on a long-distance relationship is a great vote of confidence.

2. Take the situation consciously!

   Only if you succeed in accepting the positive aspects of a long-distance relationship and not constantly rebel against it, you will be able to deal with it. This also means, for example, that you continue to enjoy the time alone with you. You should plan and shape it just like the intensive encounters with your partner.

3. Develop common rituals!

   Every love relationship, even a long-distance relationship, requires common rituals. They create anchor points in everyday life and are something that can be used even in difficult times. In some relationships, for example, it is a ritual to be free every last weekend of the month to spend nice hours with your loved one. You can also call regularly before going to bed. It does not matter how the ritual is designed, but that you develop such common habits together.

4. Talk to each other!

   Yes, you have to talk to each other in your long-distance relationship. Without a communication that occurs regularly and even leaves superficial levels, a long-distance relationship is unlikely to succeed. You should also talk about the fact of the distance itself. But when were the chances of successful communication as good as in modern times? After all, we no longer have to write a love letter or wait for weeks for one of our beloved, transported by stagecoach. So use all modern communication options.

5. Check yourself regularly!

   It sounds like a matter of course, but your meetings are an indispensable part of your long-distance relationship. It is not always easy to find a good balance between long-term planning and just as important spontaneity in life. How you deal with it depends entirely on the circumstances of each case. But one thing is certain: You may also be “crazy” from time to time. It is a special proof of love to spontaneously get on the train or in the car. Without the long-term planning around it.

6. Sometimes less is more!

   Also, if regular, good communication is especially important in a long distance relationship, then you should not overdo it. Constant messages, calls and emails can mean that you have nothing left to say. In addition, you give your loved one with too intensive contact and quickly the feeling of wanting to control him. That would have a negative impact even in close coexistence. And if the opposite happens, we also have tips if he does not answer  for you.

7. Give love a chance!

   Yes, such a long-distance relationship can be very exhausting. However, every relationship after the first “pink weeks” involves challenging aspects. Above all, work on your self-confidence and dealing with negative feelings, for example how to  fight jealousy . A relationship at a distance works like a burning glass in terms of negative emotions. Negative feelings can be slightly increased by the spatial separation. Therefore, it is especially important that you give enough space to the positive emotions in your heart. In a distance relationship, as a couple, you again and again give a commitment to love – with every meeting, every phone call and every message. That’s the special charm of such a relationship.

We are very happy if you can implement some suggestions from the article dealing with your long-distance relationship. Let us know which of the tips was especially valuable for you. We wish you a lot of success and love for your relationship.